reminded me of the day when my brother got really angry to me because i carelessly stepped on this slippery edge.. i remember i was 19 at the time, a few days before my flight to further my studies..
"why are you so careless?" he said in a hard tone. "how are you going to take care of yourself. what if this and that dotdot" i cant remember the exact words. but something in me felt shrunken. he was angry. but something in me was touched too. he was angry, but in a way that he cared. in a way that i know he meant it.
but that authoritative-sure-angry kind of tone have its differences. there are cases where people got into accidents for example, and their parents' (for example jua) first responses were blamess and anger.. "youre careless!" (how are we going to pay fr the car!) instead of saying "are you okay?" the kid sure is feeling bad enough, kekajutan kah apakah.. he deserves empathy better than judgment..
so was this story i read where there was this husband and wife. the husband goes to work that day, as his usual days. wife stays at home.. jaga their only little baby. i dont know what really happened but the kid somehow managed to grab some kind of pills kah and swallowed it.. which then led to his death.. the beautiful thing is that the husband's first response was hugging the wife, like saying "its okay, its okay.." as opposed to blaming her 'this is ur fault. u were there and u were careless. what kind of wife are u?' i mean.. come on, its not like the wife sengaja.. there must be explanations.. and afterall, she is only human.. she has suffered enough, losing the child.. and she's gonna burden herself with that guilt feeling for the rest of her life.. all she needed was really, that love and empathatic gesture.. (dont know if that was a true story kah inda ah)
there is a difference between anger-anger and loving-caring-anger.. i hope im wise enough to identify and feel the right one and more importantly, not delusioned. haha!
night night!
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