most nights

its some nights, from fun. i interpreted the lyrics the way i interpreted it. so yeah. those who know me might know what i am talking about, in relations to some parts of the lyrics (if not most)..

this week, or maybe since i did my test.. ive been thinking about MY life.. about my future.. ive buried it for quite some time and decided to just have fun and enjoy life.. but somehow made to think about it (could be since my boss called me up).. i dont want to think about it, i just wanna feel the way ive been feeling the past few months, especially the past month. but i cant really control what comes into my mind, ait? huu.

that day, boss told me to "bulatkan ati".. i guess my hati would have been bulat enough if they took me in earlier before. but it was shattered, made me think as if i have a choice (maybe i do).. i thought months will be enough to bulatkan hati.. but no, i am enjoying slack routine. its just the way i am, i think. im not that organised hard working kind of person. if i ever did produce good outcomes, thats not from "my organised step by step im good" way.. i did it the way i did it.. and if there are strains of "i wanna change the world" kind of person in me, its in my on way.. its different from "i wanna lead you, lets change the world" kind of people do. but im not a very family kind of person as well. one thing im sure about myself is, i like to try different things. i dont like being stucked in one, as i dont have burning passion in one specific thing. there are things i like, but havent found that one thing that i'd spend my life for. aha.

so... i dont know. like i said, most nights, i dont know anymore.

but i hope the zombies in my head will be gone soon. and whichever way i should go, mudahan hatiku di sanaaa.. tetapkan hatiku ya Allah.. amin..

long weekend! havent had rest two days in a row. eh last week ada jua ah, behapa ku? aha. gonna drive home later, before 5pm lah. mudahan inda stuck jalan. wanna have my sungkai there.

happy weekend! :)