yay slippery again :)

i dont know what im feeling. mcm unsettled. like "i did bad"kind of feeling. even when barangkali other people wont even see me that way, u know? rasa2han... (but could be true jua~)

and.. happy too! got my second essay.. emm first major essay (45% of total marks), the other time was optional essay 25%.. but balum lah lagi major ni. wait fr the 6000ish ones. atu 80-90% total marks tu. emm anyway, got a thin slippery distinction (again!). oh last time forgot to 'edit and update' my post arh blogger. actually, magic happened. i got exactly one mark extra, kana tambahi, when i desperately wanted it!! didnt ask from the lecturer, i said nothing about my mark. huu i was sooo amazed by... i dont know.. like, the power doa, the power of... a sincere wish. it humbled me, touched me.. within that tertimbus sincerity of wish (u didnt even expect that to happen because the chance is so slim but u felt that kind of 'hurt/pain' inside, u just wanted it to happen) and and i was just amazed and humbled by kuasa Allah.. hehehe. banar. HE listened to your silent sincere prayers... and even when you didnt get what you wanted, you're actually given even BETTER things but you didnt realise, you didnt appreciate it enough. memang hamba kurang besyukur. huhu.

Alhamdulillah. alhamdulillah ala kulli hal.

emm so i got two different essays with the SAME mark. i bet my essay is the kind of okay but not good enough but then not to give a 'just-passed-distinction' mcm kasian and alang2 th jua, yatah kana bagi saja.. heheh. but im grateful. given the way i estimate by capability and lack of experience thing... im just too lucky to get such a grade. and im happy! its like ive always hoped and wanted to get a distinction but seems unable to, but then dapat... and so, its.. good enough.. fr now.. fr me.. alhamdulillah

i feel good about the marks, because like i said "didnt know (i) could read politics..." (and law and those things) haha

now im aiming to get a full distinction fr each course! hehehe. mudahan sja. amin amin

our disTn is 75-84 and then high distinT 85+.. so yeah slippery. and not thaat good? the comment says "u have to explain more. u cant let ur readers guess what youre trying to say or refer to your references in order to understand what youre trying to say" i think thats a lot do with those politic terms and my selfishness (pkirmu smua urg th bpkir mcm kau bpkir tu and hence they faham apa kau cakap? pkirmu dorang baca apa yg kau baca and paham apa yg kau paham. oh no, u silap. haha). and yes, think got to do with my personality jua.. mcm ada certain things about myself i may hide or certain depth in what im saying and EXPECT people to actually GET me. hmmph. prnah jua si wani komen my one article (that time i asked her opinion mna satu should i publish fr boss's web) then she said mcm incomplete article ku atu, "u cant expect your readers to read ur mind!" hmmmph. so? yes. hahha

emm got a 4000 words next. of the same case, but different questions. so 2000 and 2000. i have... 5 days left! balum ku start!! just bombardment of thoughts! fr the 1st Q!

gotta 'hibernate' myself fr the next task. wish me luck! =)