semester.. batch..

so i was bored.. picked a profile from a page and then profile-hopping th ku.. mcm urg kn mncari laki bnr eh.. hahaah NO.

then i saw this profile lah.. eh, urg asgai time ani? okay.. so what.. then ada urg komen "im gonna try fr the next batch" aaaa kabak2 ku tarus. she's a girl baidaway, the one who wants to try out. and... it just made me kabak2.. so much so.. haha. i... i'd rather not meet my future batch before i meet them face to face.. hehe.. not sure if i'll blend in.. im not a friendly easygoing person.. yea...

but..  judging from PG, magicnyaa i somehow *had* to blend in with random people.. well, semester one was pretty lonely.. maybe psal nadaku regular class with the same people.. and maybe i didnt know or care how uni rolls.. heheh.. (but if i want to be defensive, my urg putih friend also claimed she couldnt get real friend in PG.. and she was from the same uni msa ia undergrad.. so i think its quite normal "not easy to get real friends" just those u say hi to.. how are you blablabla) and and bukan bah aku saja yg kepayahan PG ani.. haha.. dorang pun kpayahan jua! one of the org putihs said, she used to think pg ani sanang.. psal classnya sdikit, no exam.. TIA KRG sanang, she made a conclusion: she was a deluded child walking into a burning pit.. -ah so am i!! hahah- if u were an undergrad and did well in ur field, dont assume ur pg is gonna be easy.. wlw th it seems like "all about writing".. bcause i once heard jua an undergrad cakap "apa saja kita buat, essay kan saja.." may sound, may look that way. but pg is crazy. im done with school. this is gonna be my last academic journey. indaku mau lagi:p and fr a local undergrad who went thru the same system and methods of studying, pakai bahasa drg lagi.. and.. maybe ia punya course dlu ada glimpse of this pg.. skali when they said pg is still hard fr them, i cant help but feel normal!! haha. u imagine how much harder it is fr students like us who went thru a different system yg brabis different, not our language, never wrote an academic essay, never in for a group project and so on on on.. so yeah, its an interesting journey.. :)

semester two was tough to score but its friend-wise: not alone and its even fun - fun in a sense 'bekwan2' minus all the sadness, works and trouble. if only i were committed to "make friends" in my PG, i think uni life would have been sooo much fun. because sometimes when u spent time with em at class, u really enjoyed being with them (unexpectedly because u have no intention to make close friends).. tpi depends lah, kdgnya ada certain urg yg inda fun to be with rasanya but surprisingly one day u discover yg u can 'connect' with them.. and now, when everyone is going separate ways.. it somehow felt kind of sad.. very the minor-est sad.. so, i imagined.. what if i was into the friendship thing, it'd break my heart to say goodbye.. haha.. but seriously :) i guess, we'll just follow each other's updates from far, and... be each other's professional "networking" - for work or for tourism.. sort of.. haha

anyway. i wasnt worried about being a next batch until a few minutes ago! haha. crazy how i spent this year. i thought i wanted to buy a year so that i could be ready! oh no man.. i couldnt cope with both. so i went for academic instead of fitness.. ooo, my bad.

and now, ive been spending my time TIDUR! mengalih saya bah.. huhu. one more paper..

been hearing words "i didnt know how much i wanted it until im this close to winning" -mostly from xfactor. hahah. i think the same goes with PG.. i didnt know that i could do well in sem 1.. i wanted to prove that i could do this and in my mind it just meant not to give up and just... survive. but then miracle miracle... i got quite good results... and i got carried away.. i wanted to be better, i wanted more and more.. and then in sem 2, i got into trouble and i was being dramatic, claiming: "this is not myself.." hahah. true, i dont think this is me.. but inda plg payah dramatik cematu.. haha.. what about, just go with the flow.. see the world while sticking to who you are? discover what u can, what u cant, discover what youre good at.. etc etc?

emm.. my graduation ceremony will be held in june. june waaah. haih. not that im planning to go, wlwpun th ia in march.. but.. at least march bleh jua ku consider coming kali.. hehe. nevermind. just as long as i got through my masters.. amin..

okay. so i hope "batch" will be going well. and i blend in well. and i.. do well. i'll be alone fr next batch. its no fun. but i hope i'll enjoy it. amin ya Allah.. if thats the best for me, ya Allah beriku jalan ke arahnya.. if thats not the best fr me, engkau maha mengetahui ya Allah..