...il unfold the memories. and laugh at their silliness. cry at the sweetness. make faces at the bitterness. il read back these posts and realise how child-like it sounded. il remember things i said and laugh back at them. il remember my feelings, my thoughts.... how irrational they were? il laugh back at my photos.. at the way i dressed up.. laugh at my silly actions... even laugh at my dreams when i was 16, 17.. and yes, at those age, i thought ive grown up. now, i know... ive never grown up enough. not even at this age.
...but no matter how hard i laughed at my immaturity, that what makes me grow up, always growing up. probably, il never have the kind of thought i had when i was seventeen.. eighteen... the kind of laughters.. freedom.. the colourful dreams.. that somehow were wiser in a way- than they will ever be. i learned a lot from my kanak-kanak thought. my past makes me who i am. ive been thru a lot, but not enough to know what life is all about...
...maybe thats why when we talk to children at eye-level.. we will both learn something... like, we cant be as colourful, creative, and honest as children are... as we grow up, we begin to forget the basic fundamentals of life... all the simple things... sometimes, we just try too hard to find the answers that are right in front of us.
...hu, behapakn ku?
our internet connection might be cut-off lusa. 1st jan 2009. [not might be, but will be!]. weve been warned. katanya, if we dont pay the phone bill by the end of dec 2008, our internet connection will be cut off. awu eh, batah udh nda bebayar tlipun ah. slalunya we asked tuan rumah untuk bayar. but... biasalah urg arab, ten thousand excuses!! then, we dont even make the effort kn bjalan ke central atu mbayar tlipun. psal... mcm malas.. sma, to think of it- isnt that ok not to have internet connection time exam ani? i dont know. i think so.. antah eh. lets just see, klau si tuan rumah byarkn tlipun ada th internet tu. mn nda, nada tia. biar tia. lets work our veins,muscles out for the papers. [ohoho.. alum byk ku revise]. oh so anyway, dont miss me.
2008 has been great. so was 2007. i hope 2009 will be greater. amin.
its not too late to say selamat maal hijrah 1430 ait? selamat taun baru. may us all mnjadi lbih baik~~~
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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